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The
Scriptures indicate that marriage is an honorable institution. It is
the first institution that God sanctioned (Heb. 13:4 and Gen.
2:23-24). When Adam was made, God realized that he needed someone
like himself (human) for companionship. God said, as he looked at
Adam, before Eve, “It is not good that man should be alone"
(Gen. 2:18). This particular scripture tends to indicate that there
is a human dependence, aside from our dependence on God. In the
Garden of Eden, God was with Adam, and He walked with him. But, in
spite of this close fellowship with God, man needed someone like
himself to help him. This seems to be an inbuilt dependence of
man on man; hence, Paul said we are workers together with
Him (2 Cor. 6:1). Because of this need and God's love for man, the
woman was made for Adam and of Adam. She was made to be Adam's
helpmate. He was complete without her, but he was lonely. It is
needful that we stress the fact that God made a female for the male
partner. They both were alike in that they were human, but they were
different in that one was male and the other was female. This was/is
God's intention. (Lev. 18:22 and Romans 1:28-31; ICol. 4:4; Eph. 2:2;
and Lev. 18:22).
Another
point that should be mentioned is this: God's statement in Genesis
that, "It is not good that man should be alone" is not
meant to cover everyone individually, but it is meant to cover
everyone collectively (Gen. 2:18). Were it to cover everyone
individually, it would mean that it is not good that anyone should
be without a marriage companion. And this would be in contradiction
with other Scriptures, which indicate that there are some eunuchs
who have made themselves so for the kingdom's sake, and in
contradiction to Paul's statement that it is good that a man not
touch a woman, etc. (1 Cor. 7:7; Matt 19:11-12). However, Jesus
said that not all men can bear this statement (Matt.
19:11-12). Therefore, God spoke a general principle that has its
exceptions as He, through His holy apostles, has given them.
Eve
was taken out of Adam--God made her from one of Adam's ribs.
This indicates her place with him and that she is a part of him. It
also indicates that she is the lesser (physically weaker) of the two
because she was made of one of Adam's ribs not half of them. She was
not taken out of his head but his side; hence, she was placed at his
side and not at his head. She was made for him, hence the glory of a
man is the woman, and the glory of the woman is her hair, and, of
course, the glory of God is the man (1 Cor. 11:1-12).
I
Corinthians 11, Paul stressed the fact that the man was not made for
the woman, but the woman was, indeed, made for the man, and that
neither is the man without the woman (1 Cor. 11:8-11). This is a
paradox that will be addressed later in this text. But Paul is
really speaking of the church and Christ (Eph. 5:32). The
church was made for Christ and of Christ, and HE will
not be without the church in its future role or the church without
HIM (1 Thes. 4:17; John 14:3).
Therefore,
God has safeguarded the marriage through very strong rules of
behavior for the two parties and for the continuity of the union
itself. This is because this
marriage union transcends the significance of itself; it is
allegorical and the specificity of this union speaks to the church
and its future role in heaven (Eph. 5:32).
MARRIAGE
ROLES AND RULES
This
entire text is for believers of the word of God--those willing to
live by it and not withstand it by trying to interpret it so that it
does not have the impact it is intended to have. Jeremiah said that the
word of God was as fire and a hammer (Jer. 20:9; 23:29); Paul
said it was a sword that is sharp (Heb. 4:12). Believers,
believe, obey, and live by the Word of God. Unbelievers dilute it,
ignore it, twist it, refuse its application to them. So these
particular Scriptures speak to believers, not unbelievers.
In
Genesis 3, God cursed the human family because of their disobedience
to His commandment. This curse is called the Adamic Curse,
and this curse goes beyond the sentence of death upon mankind (which
sentence Jesus Christ died in substitution for us) also it goes to
our very life here and the continuance of that life by childbirth. A
particular curse was put on Eve (the woman) because of her actions.
It was the woman, the Bible says, who was deceived by the devil, not
Adam. Indeed the Scriptures state plainly that Adam was not
deceived! (1 Tim. 2:14; Romans 5). To the woman, God said that
He would multiply her sorrows and conceptions, and in sorrow she
would bear children, and she would look toward her husband, and he
shall rule over her. The apostle Paul picks up this theme in
Corinthians, and he says that the head of every woman is the man.
This is the same as Genesis 3, that "He shall rule over thee".
When
writing to Timothy about the proper order of the husband and wife in
the home and in the church, Paul stated that he did not permit a
woman to teach or usurp authority over man. Then he began to look at
Genesis 3; again, Adam was first formed then Eve, and because the
woman was deceived and in transgression, God put a curse on her;
however, God stated that she shall be saved through child bearing,
if she continued in the truth. Notice, if you will, Paul is not
discussing women ministers, but the role of the woman to the man
in marriage. Paul did not say that the family role was changed
from Genesis 3, where God said, "He shall rule over thee".
Indeed other Scriptures will bear this order as extant.
In
the Old Testament Scriptures To rule over the wife was a term
of the law, and it is not used per se in the New Testament. It is a
very harsh term, and it demonstrates the anger of God. New Testament
terms are less stern and more loving, yet just as precise as God
intended them.
The
marriage union is styled after the church and Christ. The
rules and roles are meant to reflect the church's relationship to
Christ. Another caveat
before going on: there is no attempt to indicate any level of
superiority or inferiority between males and females--God is
speaking about designed roles!
The
apostle Peter wrote to the church giving instructions on the role of
the wife in relation to an unsaved husband. This admonition is
needed today in the church. Many "saved" wives do not know
their roles in relations to their husbands, whether saved and
unsaved. There are some who know their roles and refuse to abide by
them. He that knows to do good and does it not, to him it is sin
(James 4:17).
Peter
said to the wives to be in subjection to their own husbands. Notice
in I Peter 3:1, he said be in subjection to their own husbands, not
to another's husband! This is a plague in many holiness
churches--wives (supposedly saved) will go in defiance of what their
husbands want to obey their pastors. That is a form of
infidelity to the husband and strange and dangerous loyalty to
another man! (Of course we are speaking in reason. We are not
talking about if the husband wants the wife to kill someone, steal
something, etc. A wife needs no pastor to tell her that this is
wrong.)
The
scripture says, be in subjection (submission, obedience)
to your own, not another's husband. When a wife
fails to do this, she sins against the husband and against
God. Think about it! If the church were to listen to Satan
while married to Christ, do you think Christ would consider it
his faithful bride or
one worthy of becoming his bride? The same is true if a wife listens
to another, whether that one is a pastor, deacon, or simply another
man. []
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